Deb Curreen Author

I don't want to go to the cemetery, but I will, and stand by your grave in the cold, with dying flowers in my hand. It's lonely and cloudy with no one about, my flowers will die in the rain. just like hope did on a grey June day. I don't want to visit the cemetery, you're not there, and I can hum Green Day songs till I'm a basket case, but I will hope against hope, and pull you from my memories, till you laugh out loud, and all becomes well with my soul. I will put on some loud music, pour a drink while you tune your guitar, then you can play something fast, and my friends will all dance, together, with all of our hearts. We know you are just missing not gone, absent, unforgotten, a pearl of great price, carried in our hearts, precious cargo, waiting at another station. Resting, till we all arrive, glorious, loud and happy to be home, at last, with you, beloved boy, missing brother, loyal friend, and eternal companio...

Whilst in a conversation with a friend the other day, who recently had an accident and is now being treated for a concussion, we touched on the subject of emotional abuse, especially within a marriage or relationship. I commented that a punch would be better as it takes months and often years to untangle all the nasty words from your brain, heart, life. Concussions and emotional beatings are not dissimilar. The heart, like the brain, is a very delicate organ, vital to a healthy functioning body. When either becomes damaged almost everything physically is affected ie. your breathing, eating, sleeping, etc. and day to day living starts to get a bit hard and often unmanageable, difficult or nearly impossible in the worst cases. My youngest brother, before he took his life in 2006, suffered a huge concussion in a car accident so after his death I researched concussions and closed head injuries. A closed head injury is when your head receives a massive blow but there is no bleedin...

Is Facebook or farcebook as I like to call it, really the root of all evil or perhaps like money, it is the love of facebook that is the root of evil. As a free marketing or advertising tool, you really can't beat it. Especially those free buy, sell, swap pages which must be causing the likes of TradeMe, eBay, etc. to take a big hit. Good job Facebook! There is the part of facebook that has been well-documented by counselors, shrinks, Doctors and media personalities, so I won't dwell on it, and that is the effect "likes" and "hates" on social media, have not just teenagers but everyone. Pictures of my dogs always get loves and likes...I don't know if I have ever had any angry faces but I have had some of what I thought were my brilliant posts, ignored!?  That could be interpreted as "a hate." Maybe?? It's also very interesting who you end up viewing when you see old friends or long lost family members "like" your friends...

Tomorrow I am having a book launch for my first book of poems that I self-published last year (this is 2019) Here is my checklist of things to do and take before tomorrow morning.: Books !!!!! Pens Speech Revise speech Print speech and revise again and print, check one more time… Select 20 outfits then choose one Buy wine for book launch celebrations to be held later in the day Paint nails Change outfit choice Remember books and business cards Water Choose shoes or boots to wear? Stockings - what colour? Change nail polish shade Find favorite lipstick and perfume Change outfit and buy a new jacket and pair of boots and another nail polish just in case and an extra lipstick Iron outfit, polish shoes Revise speech, print, check Remove nail polish and repaint in the new shade Group message everyone to pray Delete the message and send to a new group with a new message Change outfit one last time Put books, pens, change of shoes and jacket and lipstick, pens, water, ...

It’s another year. The days still hang with nights that slow a heart’s beat. Clouds become as big and heavy as the sodden cheeks of mothers, with the tears that have spilt, soaking the ground where dogs stand barking. I beat back the air, stamping my feet, trying to kill death, as my screams reach Heaven. Did you ever hear them? So loud   that they lasted forever, as I tried to pull you back. I tried to block the spreading grief, with all my heart and all my strength, and every shout of, “No! No! No!” laying on your body, looking for a trade, trying to pull you back, from the cold night and the darkness I couldn’t stop, that blocked your cries from getting back to me. Now I pray, Heaven keep you. The dogs stand watching a heavy sky, tears spilling on a cold night, and there’s still a distant echo of - “ no…no…no…”

MOTHERS DAY I wear this scarf, every day around my neck, like your love it drapes around me and keeps me warm, on days of little sun. At night I hang this mantle of your care, a watchman over my dreams, the guard upon my life, silk falling above my head as I softly breathe beneath your love. Every day, I search out this scrap of you, twining comfort and memory against my throat, thinking of you, not so far away, but not here with me, wishing to see your smiling face and hear you laugh about just how stink a life can turn, and without you, all seems dark. Sometimes if not for your phone calls, constant and hoped for, my days would go on forever. Watch me hold this slip of silken love, that you have delivered to me, unbidden as it falls against my breast, I can breathe, knowing you are with me, wrapped in this wispy gift. Psalm 23 v 4: I will fear no evil, for thou art with me.

Hasn't this blog got a great title? You will want to read it,either to avoid dancing with the devil or because you want to see how audacious I can be when writing on such a loaded subject. We have all heard the saying, "dance with the devil", and it seems to imply courting danger, running close to a risky and perilous wind, perching on the knife edge of death and similar metaphorical catch phrases. All explanations intended to extend caution or glamourise a more risky evil, flying in the face of God, intentionally sinning. One of the creepiest but insanely best lines was uttered by Jack Nicholson playing the The Joker, in the 1989 Tim Burton, Batman movie. "Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?" He chuckles into the ear of a weak and fainting, Vicky Vale, played most excellently by Kim Basinger. To me, he seems to be implying, "Well Honey, if you haven't before you sure are now !!!   "Argh, argh, argh !" Bad Joker, ...